Stopping the Inner War
Like a wounded soldier in everyday clothes,
you march in
looking like you’ve escaped a war zone.
I see your scars
and I hear the exhaustion in your voice
as you plea:
“Help me fix myself!”
.
The battle is not going well.
You have tirelessly fought, rejected, and resisted
your own experience;
your unwanted thoughts and feelings, habits, and moods.
Wanting to be different from the way you are,
you have come to believe that there is something
fundamentally wrong with you.
But I won’t be recruited to fix, attack or reject any part of you.
And I won’t collude with any side
when the war you are fighting is against yourself.
You have barely paused to notice
the impact of your own inner violence.
But each time you make a part of yourself the enemy
you amplify your suffering.
And so I raise a white flag
and call for a ceasefire.
Let’s get to know all sides in this battle
and what they are fighting so hard to protect.
Let’s invite all the rejects to the table:
the angry, the sad,
the greedy, the needy, the lonely,
the anxious, the proud, the insecure,
and whoever else is longing
to be heard and understood.
Instead of resisting these parts of yourself--
suppressing
judging
trying to fix, consider,
what would it be like
to accept yourself
in this moment,
just as you are?
This non-violent terrain may feel
strange and unfamiliar;
it can be threatening
to let down your guard.
But as you drop your weapons
and surrender
you might notice a shift
A lightness
A release from the burdens weighing on you.
And from this place
of inner-safety and self-acceptance,
You might discover a renewed energy
to accept your response-ability;
that is,
your ability to respond to your life
and to move towards what truly matters to you.
Simply ask yourself,
in this moment,
what parts of myself am I fighting?
What am I resisting?
And what can I meet
with greater compassion and acceptance?